BIG NEWS! I was just hired to work for one of the best and fastest-growing businesses in town. What’s the job? I’ll be managing James Acme’s HR and back office administration. (You know, payroll, benefits, risk management.) Mr. Acme interviewed a lot of people before choosing me, but no one had the same HR expertise. Truth be told, I don’t work alone. I’m part of a whole team of experienced HR pros. Together, we’re G&A Partners. Building an in-house team of accredited HR professionals like ours could easily cost a million bucks, but companies can hire us for roughly the price of one full-time HR employee. We’re sort of like a Million Dollar Employee. Mr. Acme likes that he’s getting the depth and strength of an entire department for the price of one. I like that I get to be a trusted member of his team and give him time to grow his business.
I’m rolling up my sleeves and getting to work. I’m not going to lie, there is a lot of paperwork! That may sound excruciating to some people, but I love that I’m able to remove some of the stacks that have been piling up on Mr. Acme’s desk. He’s got more stacks than the pancake house around the corner. It looks like the special for today is a tall stack of employee benefits with a side of payroll tax forms. No thanks, right?!? Don’t worry – I’ve got this. With our state-of-the-art systems and processes, I know I’ll be able to eliminate most of this paperwork without so much as a hiccup. And I’ll spare Mr. Acme a whole bunch of indigestion.
WHOA! Hold the phone! I just discovered that Mr. Acme has been paying benefit premiums for several employees who left the company earlier this year. I’d calculate the loss on that little glitch to be around $100,000. Sounds crazy, I know, but for businesses that experience seasonal turnover or companies that are growing quickly, like Mr. Acme’s, it’s a fairly common oversight. Often busy business owners are trying to manage their own HR or internal HR teams are being stretched too thin. Keeping track of all the paperwork associated with employee benefits can be tricky, especially if that isn’t your primary focus or area of expertise. Anyway, all is good for Mr. Acme now. We’ve stopped the bleeding and I’ll be on top of it going forward so those costly mistakes won’t happen again.
Summer is certainly in full swing, and the thermometer isn’t the only indicator. I walked down the hall today and no one is in the office. Everyone’s enjoying their summer vacations. Tis the season, I know, but it’s got to be affecting the company’s productivity. Lucky for Mr. Acme, this Million Dollar Employee is never “gone fishing,” “out to lunch,” or “under the weather,” so no grass is growing under our feet in HR this summer.
We did it! We successfully ran our first payroll for Mr. Acme and his company. No errors, no glitches. Nothing out of the ordinary there. Once the necessary data is imported to our system, it’s really relatively easy. The trick becomes keeping up with the changes from one pay period to the next. State and federal payroll taxes fluctuate through the course of the year and employees are bound to adjust their deductions. Busy business owners, like Mr. Acme, really shouldn’t attempt to do this themselves. For anyone crazy enough to try, may I suggest professional help!